Merry Freakin' Xmas

our ghetto ass tree


the beautiful entertainment center


where my gifts at?


no, seriously, where's the toys?







Today was one of the weirdest Christmases ever. It wasn't really bad or anything, just weird. Jack slept in which meant that I got to sleep in too. Then we all got up and began to decorate in the living room with stuff we bought from Goodwill yesterday. The tree was already up but we added some Hanukah lights and some corny stockings. As you can see Chris Rock is on the TV. We watched standup on comedy central all day. I cleaned the house and Jack slept on Derrick. Collin worked until 7 and i only got to see him for about an hour.

Then we put on our hideous Xmas sweatshirts (also from Goodwill) and tried to go find some dinner. We were going to get Chinese but I guess the Chinese have decided to celebrate Xmas this year. Then we were going to go to the buffet at the casino because it was open, but when we got there it was an hour wait!!! It was crazy. But we got to see this strung out and drunk white trash woman teetering around the casino floor. Collin brought up an interesting point the other day. Has anyone noticed that middle aged white trash women often look deceptively young? Are they being preserved by all the Coors Light? That's what this woman looked like. I promised Collin I would look like her in 20 years.

So we left and went to Jack in the Box. It was tasty and unhealthy and the perfect end to a good ol' American Xmas.

I hope you all had a nice day. i hope you got all of the lube and vibrators that you asked for.

Yo Bro!

My brother is on town through the 3rd. It's so cool. It worked out well too because Teresa (the lady who watches Jack) just had to fly back to Indiana because her father died suddenly. So my brother has been watching Jack while we are at work. jack and him have fun during the day.

I think we may go get tattoos this Thursday. I have 3 that i want but one of them is kind of big and it still needs to be drawn up. Another isn't as big but it aslo needs to be drawn up. The smaller one that I want would be on the inside of my right wrist. But I'm wondering if that would be wise considering my new job. I know it wouldn't be a huge deal because i wear blazers and stuff so my wrists are usually covered. Plus it will just be on the underside and it will be kinda small.

Work is going well. We have another audit tomorrow and we better pass or skulls are getting cracked. I'm seriously sick of working 10-15 hour days just to get this stuff done.

I'm beat. I'm going to bed.

I'm an Important Advertising Executive

Today, William, our area manager, paid us a visit. All I have to say is that I'm convinced that Calvin klein is fueled by ego centric, fashionable homosexuals, and I mean that as a compliment. Although he beat our (me and German, my general manager) asses down, it was a god learning experience. We have sooooooooooo much work to do on the store to get it to where it needs to be.

It's so crazy that I can "write people up" and "terminate" them. We had a meeting the other night and German and I had to lay the smack down on all of these people. I felt kinda shitty but it also felt kind of cool. Plus I get to cash my first paycheck tomorrow which ain't too shabby either.

I'm exhausted though. I worked 50 hours last week. I gotta go to bed. Another day, more people to fire.

O Tanenbaum

I finally got my tree. i will put up pics of it soon. I ordered it from ebay. It's 3 feet tall, white, plastic, covered in glittered and pre-lit with white, blinkie lights. It's a thing of ghetto beauty. i got some ornaments from the dollar store and put those up on it as well. It's so incredibly tacky, which is why it is perfect for me. I call it my "winter solstice tree" because that is what I will be celebrating from now on. I'm sick of freakin' Christmas, so I'm changing it up. Be on the lookout for your gifts everyone. They are cumming!

Calvin Freakin' Klein

i can now breathe a sigh of relief, for about 2 seconds. I got the job at CK and it's cool but it's hectic. I like hectic though. The days have flown by even though I've been working 10 hour shifts. Next Tuesday I will be working a 15 hour shift. It's amazing how time passes when you are doing a trillion things ar once. Each day I would look at my watch and say, "Is it 4 already? Damn!" The people I work with are cool and I like being the boss. My boss wants to get a promotion to area manager and when he does I will be running the store and then I will drunk with power. The corporate office is in NYC so I told him that if he ever needs to send me there I would be glad to go.

The "uniform" is all black so I've got to go shopping and now my closet is very "goth chic" or very "Ann Yoo." This reminds me of a conversation from many years ago. Here is a transcript of it:

Erika: Wow, look at both sides of our closet. Mine is so colorful and yours is all black. Ann, are you depressed?
Ann: No, I just like black, it's slimming.

Anyhoo, it's nice to be working again. I feel like a real person. Plus I like to make people lick my boots.

sigh.....sigh

my job search is still not over. i had another damn interview at frickin CK today. I won't find out until tomorrow if I have the job. This is getting fucking ridiculous. I'm too aggrivated to even give all the details. I'm truly at the bottom of the bell jar now. I can't tell you how fucking broke I am. I feel defeated. I hate it. I feel like I don't have a purpose when I'm not working. Collin hates his job too. His friend has already told him that he has a job at her graphic design firm in Tampa. Maybe we will go on the lam.

Why am i tragically unhirable????? Is there anyone out there who would like to employ me for a fair salary???? Anyone?