UHaul should be paying me

We are about to move over to Everett (Oct 1) and thankfully the government moves all of our stuff. The catch to them moving you is that they don't take your stuff to your new place the same day that they pick it up. Instead it takes a few days so you have to move your essentials yourself.

This means I will be taking a trip to my local UHaul to pick up a trailer sometime soon.

After living in New York I feel like I should've purchased stock in UHaul. Considering that I used to hang out with the owner's daughter in high school I feel like I should be given some discounts or something.

Couldn't they have a "punch card" like your local coffee shop? After the four(?) moves that I have done with Kevin and the 2(?) that I did with Jenny I think I would've filled that card by now.

Why couldn't I have invented UHaul?!?! I'd be so rich that I could punch Paris Hilton in the face and she wouldn't be able to do a damn thing about it.